I like to joke that I was a really nice person before I had kids. I yelled a lot less before I had kids. I worried less. I didn’t get pushed to my limit nearly as much when it was just me and Steve–no kiddos.
When the boys were born I truly believed I could be the perfect mom. I would be patient but firm. I would be fun and easy-going. With every breath I would encourage them to be the best they could be. I never wanted to yell or lose my temper. I quickly began to see that no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t be perfect. We’d have a fun day playing at the park or a successful trip to the grocery store. We’d watercolor in the afternoon and the boys would take good naps. I’d feel like the best mom in the world! Then before dinner I’d lose my temper over something small and feel like a complete failure. The whole day was ruined. I was an awful mom.
Someone once told me not to look at parenting in one single moment, or one day. We raise our children over seasons and years. One moment doesn’t define us. And thankfully, there is so much grace.
Mother’s Day feels so different this year. I’ve been aware for a few years that I have ‘big kids’ now and not ‘little kids’. They are growing up! But wow, this year they have grown SO MUCH. They went from big kids to teenagers. They’re physically big, a lot more opinionated and so much fun. As they grow I understand now more than ever that what they need is unconditional love. Yes, the need to be fed and have clean clothes. They need to be encouraged to work hard in school and reminded to do their chores. They need structure and routines.
But most of all, they need someone who will listen to them without freaking out. They need someone to accept and love them no matter what. I tell Matthias {David is non-verbal}, “You can tell me anything and we’ll figure it out together.” He comes to me periodically and shares his heart and I do my very best to listen without judgement. I try not to give advice unless he wants it. I want to be a mom who loves unconditionally. Isn’t that what we all want most–someone to love us without judgement?
Hugs to you mama! Motherhood is crazy hard and it isn’t defined by one difficult moment. We shape and nurture our children over seasons and years and there is so much GRACE. There is love, so much love.
I wrote a little poem about Motherhood and love we pour our for our children.
…
Mom’s Love
The love of a mom
Comes deep from inside
It’s a powerful force
It’s the wind on your side
I love your poem. I miss my Mom but I know she is with God now.
nice to know you better not just your beautiful jewelry but your beautiful heart. thanks for sharing. Happy Mother’s Day!
You constantly give me smiles. I have three kids with serious health issues. Your story, like my beautiful bracelet with their three names, gives me hope. Blessings to your family.
Lisa, you are an inspiration. Thank you ❤️
So so sweet!
Perfectly said!
Absolutely!! Being a mom is hard enough! Feeling a need to be perfect makes it even harder.
Love this ? Thank you for putting a smile on my face today. You ARE amazing!
Thank you Lisa! I needed to read this today! You are a blessing! ??
Just what I needed today. Thank you
I’ve ordered my five children’s name rings… love them. (even though one kid’s name was misspelled), *it’s okay… love you even more for this blog post.
What a beautiful Momma you are, and what an honest and lovely share.
From one *I planned on being perfect too* Mom, to another… You. Are. Enough. <3
Wow! So heartfelt. Made me cry! Thank YOU! XO
Love the poem…and love the transparency in the thoughts you share…..We all are learning about life and love through our children, and their children, every day of our life. It is a gift that keeps on giving, even on cloudy days.
Thank you! I wanted to be a mom since I was a little girl. I was also going to be the perfect mom! I remember the tears I cried when I first realized I was NOT a perfect mom. I could name all the ways I wasn’t perfect. But then I made myself name all the ways I was a fabulous mom. Not perfect… but pretty great much of the time… most importantly, my kids know how much they are loved. I’ve decided that that is perfect in itself, no matter my shortcomings! Nice to know I’m not alone.
its so true about that split second it takes to lose control after having such a wonderful day —-and wondering what kind of mother we are for loving soooo much and the kids don’t understand all the energy it takes to get thru your day for THEM ——
And at the end of the day — its all worth it and we’d do it all over again the next day and forever—-❤️
You sound like an amazing mother with alot to offer your children and appreciate your every moment— continue your love and gift of sharing!!
Love to you Lisa!
So very true and beautiful
Struggling so much with this right now with our 17 year old…..setting boundaries vs letting her go. Watching her make mistakes that affect, not just her, but the whole family. Balancing tough and truthful love sometimes doesn’t look unconditional…..it is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
It’s the water and sunshine that helps us to grow <3
Tears! I’m sending your poem to my four children. Thank you, Lisa!
Your reminder that I am not defined by one moment as a parent brought tears to my eyes! I so needed to hear that!
What a beautiful poem and story! Thank God for a Mom’s love, unconditional and unending!
Beautiful. You are an encouragement.
Thank you for this beautiful poem. My daughter is getting married but I will not be at the wedding. I was looking this morning of what to send to her and decided to give her my sapphire necklace and earrings for something “blue” but I was still trying to figure out what to tell her. Then I opened up your email and read your poem. The universe was speaking to me. I hope it is ok that I copy this to put in her gift. Please let me know as I will make sure your signature is on it.
I also want to thank you as I purchased a ring from you “brave love” and it is beautiful and I love wearing it. So Happy Mothers Day to you! God created us all in our own unique ways to love and spread love. xoxo
Lisa,
Your beautiful poem brought me to tears. So poignant and from the heart.
Thank God we have the Grace to get through what the good Lord has placed in our paths.
Love, Understanding and Compassion is how we should all try to live and this big old World would be a much better place?❤️
God Bless??
So beautiful , open and true. You truly are a wonderful mother. There is a song I heard were the singer states all mothers will have a place in sainthood.
This is so beautiful.
I would LOVE to have a copy of this to give to my 84 yr. old Mom! (signed would be awesome).
She was that imperfect Mom, but gave her ALL to us 5 kids. She always did the best she could with what she was dealt.
We put her through so much as we were growing up, but she NEVER quit. She did whatever she had to do to raise good people, & she did!!!
Thank you for you blog and this beautiful poem…❤️
P.S. You’re sons are so blessed to have a Mom that takes the time to be so aware of them!
God bless you & your family, ~Cathy O.
So beautiful- I don’t have the words❤️
Beautifully said.
So awesome!! Thank you so much for sharing all your blog with us. We LOVE and then LOVE more no matter which path LIFE takes them down. I see it now with my grandson who is THE HEART IF MY HEART. He has many challenges facing him at only 21/2 yrs of age. Yet, we are so BLESSED and we will encourage & support him and will definitely be his advocate as long as we, his loved ones, live!!
I needed this so much this morning…poem is so heartfelt and true and if read just right you can see Christ giving us mothers as well as all his children that same love….he just gave mothers the ability to render it more deeply on this earth.
May I share your poem on Facebook?
It is beautiful! I will certainly give you the credit
Love.
Thank you for this. It’s so true. I have three beautiful bright kids and all are teenagers now. I have regrets knowing I wasn’t always the perfect mom, but I think I’ve done something right. They’re kindhearted, hardworking and compassionate young people. Happy Mother’s Day soon to all of the beautiful moms out there!
You have inspired us all.
Your jewelry has been a constant reminder and I now enjoy sharing it with my children who now have children of their own.
Thank you again
Beautifully said! Thank your for this – just what I needed this week. Love my kids to the moon and back but ugh, some days!!!
Before I had kids I thought that loving them would be enough. Then I had kids and I worried that every decision I made was the wrong one and that I was screwing them up for life. Now two are adults and two are teens and I realize that guess what? Loving them really is enough! Loving and listening and being there – all the little stuff you do your best and sometimes you make mistakes but it’s ok. And sometimes THEY make mistakes and it’s ok. My adult boys are really fine men – goofy and funny but hard working and kind. And my teenage girls are sweet and loving and also goofy and funny and sometimes life overwhelms them but they come to me. And when life overwhelms me I know all four of them are there for me too.
Ok, I think I did get lucky too…..
Just want to let you know how much I love all your jewelry and what it means, family. My youngest daughter struggled for years to have a baby. Heartbreak after heartbreak she persevered. November 6th 2016 she gave birth to twin girls conceived through a donor a month premature. And a big thank you to donors. My daughters and daughter in law all have something from your collection to celebrate the gift of love and life. Me, I have worn my bar necklace with all 6 of my grandchildren’s birthstones since I got it for Valentine’s Day. I have never taken it off! Thank you.
Read your story on your blog. You are a beautiful family, and Steve is such a precious soul.
And you don’t have to be a perfect mom, your kids will love you always.
When reading your blog, I could feel the love in your heart and the love for you family.
I am a witness when you give it does come back to you two-fold.
Love your my new rings (3) that I purchased from you, I will be purchasing other items.
God Bless you,
Thank you for sharing as I struggle with my teen today.
So beautiful. You don’t have to be perfect, just present, loving and kind.